Christmas Only In Da Philippines

CHRISTMAS ONLY IN THE PHILIPPINES:

1. Carol Groups.  People who ask for alms, namedrop organizations, and use handicappedness as reason for begging.
2. Garbage collectors who demand "pamaskos". Ignore them just as they ignore their duties-- they bang your gates and curse you.
3. The noche buena. Never complete without a 1.5 liter of Coke.
4.  Parols (Christmas Lanterns) and Christmas lights.  Never a holiday without these. Always bring cheer from the richest snobs to the humblest poor.
5. Christmas Parties. Parlor games, awards, and the much -awaited raffle every year.
6. Longer traffic jams. Mostly caused by the jeepneys who need extras - - to buy booze and booze.
7. Long lines at the malls. A community on its own: the "singit", the inconsiderate show-off who repeatedly counts money, the annoying attention-seeking little boy, the pervert who keeps staring at you, and the snatcher.
8. Last-minute shoppers. The main players in a sport played every last few days before  Christmas and New Year's Eve.
9. Inaanaks. Suddenly, you had a godchild.
10. Anywhere strollers. Makes parks out of malls or even the simple overpass. The more you're on the rush, the more they get slower.
11. Nangangaroling. Give to one group and more will come. When you're out of goods to give, don't be surprised if the next day you find your dead dog, human feces at the lawn, a broken window and a death threat painted on your gate.
12. Inuman. Holidays are a great excuse to drink.